Don't Walk Away This Time
by The Soul Piper
Summary: (COMPLETE) How many good things is she going to pass up? Parker is amazing, but will Lily realize it in time? Or will the rest of the world win and keep their relationship down? (SLASH)
1. Cool Beans

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to the-N**

**Claimer: I own Hot Water Mouse, and any songs I might decide to put in as theirs.**

**Warning: This is a slash a.k.a yuri a.k.a femslash a.k.a lime a.k.a FEMALE/FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS! IF YOU'RE HOMOPHOBIC, DON'T READ THIS. **

Did I make a mistake? I guess so. I mean, I had not _one_, but _two_ guys who were crazy about me. I didn't do anything about it, and now I'm all alone. Travis has Bridget. Ray has, well...everyone. I haven't even been able to spend some quality time with Robbie, now that he's dating Kim, as if I don't know. Needless to say, RFR was canceled for today. Everyone was kind of busy with their personal lives...except for me, of course. I don't really have much of one. I just wish...I wish that I acted on my feelings when I had the chance. I wish I had someone to call my own. I bet I would have been happier. I'll never know now.

"Hey Ran," Parker greeted me, breaking my thoughts. She took a seat next to me on the staircase. It was one of my favorite places to hang out in the school.

"Oh hey, Parker. What are you doing here? I thought everyone left. You do realize that school ended, like, 20 minutes ago, right?" I asked her.

"I know. I had to stay back and talk to...someone. It's not important. Anyway, I was on my way out when I saw you. You look kind of depressed. What's up?"

"It's nothing," I lied. Parker saw right through me.

"Come on Lil. You know you can tell me anything."

"Hmm, I don't know..."

"Please," she gave me her infamous puppy dog pout.

"All right, all right! I've just been a bit down lately."

"Why?"

"Travis and Ray."

"Oh, because they've moved on?"

"Yeah," I said, looking down at my feet. I placed my elbows on my lap and rested my chin on my palms as I sighed.

"Come on, Lil. You've got to get back up. One day you'll find someone who's gonna blow you away. And when you do, Travis and Ray won't even matter to you because you're gonna be so happy all you'll think about is the present, and how great the future will be with that person," Parker smiled.

"Are you speaking from experience?" I playfully asked her.

"Um, not really _experience_. More like fantasy," Parker started to blush. I sat up excitedly as I ringed.

"You have a crush!"

"No," she lied as her face turned an even deeper red.

"Yes you do," I smiled wider. "Parker's got a cru-ush. Parker's got a cru-ush!" I chanted like a child would. "Who is it?"

"It's nobody."

"Sure," I said sarcastically. "Is it lee Johns?"

"Eww no!"

"How about Ed?"

"No!"

"Ted?"

"He wishes! Come on, forget about me. Let's focus on you, huh? Got plans for tonight?"

"Urrrg! Do I look like a girl with a social life?" I asked.

"I say we have a night out...just the two of us. We can go see a movie or even better, I hear that Hot Water Mouse is playing at Mickey's tonight. We could go check that out.

"Now way? Hot Water Mouse?" I asked. They were a local indie band who's songs had been featured on RFR in the past.

"What sounds better? A night of depressing emo music? Or a might of just being depressed...alone?"

She had one me over. "Ok, I guess it's better than sitting around moping about people who don't care about me anymore.

"Excellent!" Parker said, doing her best Mr. Burns impression.

"I have to do some homework first. Can I meet you at your house around, say, 8:00?"

"Cool beans. It's a date."

**A/N: Please tell me what you think of this so far (if you hate it and you have nothing constructive to say, then just don't say anything)**


	2. It's Ok

The music was loud and I could feel my heart beating to the gloomy tune as Parker and I walked through to doors of Mickey's, later that night. She was wearing a black vintage Ramones t-shirt and a short pleated kilt with her rainbow knee-highs. I just changed into a navy blue tank top and jeans. I was sill feeling down and wasn't in the mood for dressing up.

I watched as my friend began to rock her hips...her whole body to the song. Her slow rhythmic movements seemed hypnotic and before long, I couldn't look away. There was a part of me that really wanted to, but oddly enough, another part of me loathed the idea. Why? Parker was my friend, I knew, but in that one moment, I ...No. No, no and no!

"What is this song? I love it," she said.

I cleared my throat before speaking. "It's, 'In the House of Flies' by the Deftones," I told her. She simply nodded her head and returned to dancing. Desperate to leave that awkward moment that I caused without her noticing, I asked Parker if I could but her a drink.

"No, I asked you to come. Let _me_ get _you_ a drink," she insisted.

She was gone before I could even tell her what I wanted. I took a seat at an empty table near the window. Bored, I tapped my fingers to the tune of the ending song. Within minutes, Parker returned with two drinks in her hand.

"A root beer float for me and a large chocolate milkshake with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles for you, Lil," she said with a smile.

I looked at her, my drink and once again at her. "Parker...how did you know this was what I wanted?" I asked suspiciously.

"Fact: when Lily Randall is feeling blue, she loves the sweet stuff. This is the sweetest stuff they have here, so I figured you'd like it." I smiled at her. How did she know me so well already? We'd only been friend for a few months and she already knew some things that Ray _still_ didn't know, years after friendship.

"There's the smile I know and love," Parker said.

I attempted to take a sip of the viscous, sugary substance in front of me, and failed. The drink was so thick that I ended up sucking the straw right to the back of my mouth. I choked as I felt it almost go down my throat. Parker abandoned her drink to be by my side, gently patting my back.

"I'm ok. I just sucked too hard," I said. Parker stared at me immaturely. "Shut up!" I yelled, humorously, knowing the kinds of dirty jokes going through hear head. We both started to laugh. She was about to respond, but Mickey came on stage.

"And now, the band you've all been waitin...Hey kid, you break it, you bought it," he yelled at a boy in the back. "Anyways, the band you've all been waiting for, Hot Water Mouse!" Mickey moved out of the way so that the lead singer, Andrew, could be seen.

"Hey, how's it going?" He asked the crowd shyly. Everyone cheered as an answer. "This first song is about a girl that I was obsessed with back in high school. You all know how it is, right? When the one you love just can't look at you in the same way?"

"I hear you, Buddy," Parker said under her breath while the rest of the crowd cheered more. The band started to play their song.

I found it kind of weird how the night had been full of loud, depressing music, and yet, I was having fun. I looked over at the girl beside me. She was the reason _why_ I was having fun. Parker was a great friend to me.

I watched as she bobbed her head left to right. Her eyes were closed and I could see her slightly mouth the words to the song: "When will you see that I'm alive. When will you care? I'm right over here."

I listened to the song, cheerfully. Cheerfully, until _they_ walked in, that is.

"Lily, Parker, I didn't expect to see you here?" said Ray. He was with one of his many new girlfriends and he actually had the nerve to come talk to me.

"Well, it's no place you and I have never been before, Raymond," I said, my voice dripping with impatience. I wanted to leave now. Whatever fun I was having was lost once Ray and What's Her Name showed up.

"Um, Parker, I'm suddenly not feeling well," I lied. Once again, she saw right through me, but this time, she decided not to call me on it.

"I guess we should be leaving. My parents are expecting me home soon anyways," she said. "See ya, Ray. Bye, um..." She had no clue what to call the girl on his arm. I had a few choice words, but didn't want to get into it.

"Shelly," the girl introduced herself. It was probably better that way, since I was sure Ray had forgotten her name by the way his eyes lit up when Parker didn't know it either.

I grabbed my coat and walked out with my friend, leaving the performance that I was enjoying, not long ago. A tear rolled down my cheek. Seeing Ray was a reminder of what I missed out on. A reminder of what was now available to every girl but me. I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Parker, pulling me closer.

"It's ok, Lil. Everything is ok."


	3. The Socoial Worker

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to The-N**

I sighed in relief. History was finally over and I was on my lunch break. While on my way to my locker, I heard a familiar voice coming from one of the rooms in the guidance office. It was the room where kids go to speak with the Jeff, school social worker.

"Thanks a lot. I'm glad I have somebody I can talk to about...you know."

"Parker?" I asked myself. "No way!" I found it hard to believe that there was something so wrong with her that she would need to visit the social worker.

"Don't worry about it. I can't give you any names, but you'd be surprised at how many other kids like you there are in this school. You're not alone," Jeff said.

"That makes me feel a lot better. I think I'm ready to tell now. I have to go."

"Alright, Parker. Take it easy, ok?"

"I will," she said as she opened the door and closed it behind her. When Parker turned around, she was surprised to see my questing blue eyes on her.

"Parker, what's up? I didn't know you had to see Jeff," I said knowing I was being a bit intrusive.

"Uh...I...," she couldn't speak.

"Wait, does this have anything to do with the guy you have a crush on?"

She gave me a kind of guilty look. "Sort of."

"Well who is it? If you're afraid to tell him, then I can just talk to him for you...get things started," I said.

"You might not want to if I told to, Lily. In fact, you might hate me."

"Don't be silly."

"Look, Maybe I'll tell you later, but not now." Parker began to walk away from me.

"Did I make you angry?" I asked her, feeling sorry that I brought anything up.

"No, Lily. I'm sorry. I...I'm just mad at myself. I was all ready to do something, but now...I'm chickening out."

"I see."

"Hey, do you want to come over to my house tonight? I just got 'The Butterfly Effect' last night, but I haven't gotten a chance to watch it yet."

"That sounds like fun." I said.

"And I promise there will be no cameo appearances by Ray Brennan or anyone else. It'll just be you and me."

"I'm in. But, I have something to do right after school, so can I come over around 5:00?" I asked. RFR was on for today and I couldn't miss it.

"No prob. I'll be waiting."

**A/N: I know that this was short, but I'm bored and I just wanted to get this little chunk out of the way. Trust me, the next chapter will be much better.**


	4. I'm A Jerk

"So really, I don't know if I should go out with _Jennifer _for a few hours before I go out with Tammy, or if is should go out with _Michelle_, before I go out with Tammy."

"Pronto, do you think it's a good idea to talk about this on the air? What if those girls are listening?" I said, trying to shut him up. For a half an hour, I listened to him talk about his social dilemma, and I was getting madder by the minute. I was sure that I didn't want to listen to this anymore that the people at home.

"Come on, Shady. Give him a break. Pronto's got people out there for him that he can brag about. Some people aren't that lucky," Question Mark said. By the expression on his face, I knew he was referring to his secret relationship with Kim.

"Really, well speaking of lucky, here's the latest song from The Four Leaf Clovers." I had to cut to a song. There were some things I wanted to say, but none of had to be said on the air. "What was that all about, Robbie?" I asked.

"What did _I_ do? I just think that if you've got a girl, it's a real shame to keep her a secret," he explained.

"Really? Then why don't you just take bring Kim around, huh? I'm sure she'd just _love_ to hang out with Question Mark and the rest of the RFR gang...oh wait a second, she _wouldn't_! It's never going to work out between you two. Love is just a lie," I said, exposing the secret he tried so hard to keep. I knew I wasn't being myself. I knew that it was unlike me to do that to one of my best friends, or _anyone_, for _that_ matter. I was frustrated. I hated everyone for being so damn happy all the time. It was as if, if I couldn't be that way, nobody should either. I was selfish.

"What?" Ray asked.

"Robbie, is this true? You and Kim Carlisle are dating? Why didn't you say anything? You know you can tell us anything," Travis said.

And then it happened. Something I'll never forget. When Robbie looked at me...when I saw the hurt in his eyes, I knew that I had just lost my friend. As he stood up from his usual seat at our headquarters, I saw him try to fight back a tear and loose.

"I'm out of here," he announced as he grabbed his backpack.

"Robbie, wait," Ray called. "Nice going!" he said as he ran past me to catch up to him. Travis made his way out of the booth to catch up to Robbie as well, only he said nothing to me. He didn't even look at me. I wasn't there to him. After standing around by myself for a moment, I left too.

"Robbie, who cares about what she said? She's been acting weird, lately," Ray told him.

"Yeah, I'm sure you and Kim Make a great couple. You two are going to be just fine!" Travis assured him. "We an even go on a triple date the tonight. You and Kim, Ray and...someone, and me and Bridget."

"Bridget?"

"Yeah, she's been back since this morning. It's going to be fine."

There I stood, only a few feet away from the tree of them, unsure of whether or not I should apologize. I had know right to say what I said and I really _was_ sorry, but as I looked at them, as I saw them bonding I suddenly felt as if I lost my place in that tight group. A triple date? That definitely did not include me. I took a step forward. I was going to do it. I was going to apologize. No. I backed away and turned around. My movements were rapid and uncertain. I had a change of heart. I turned back around. I would apologize for _sure _this time. No. No, not this time. I turned back around but this time, I would not go back.

"Lily, hi. This is a surprise. I wasn't expecting you until 5:00," Parker said after opening the door and seeing me.

"Yeah, I know. Th...things didn't really go as smoothly as planned and now...now..." I began to cry. Tears flowed out of me like I was a faucet. My friend...my _only_ friend was quick to embrace me. She felt so soft...so warm. She was exactly what I needed.

"What happened?" she asked me, loosening her hug so that her arms would sill be around me, but she could look into my eyes.

"I'm a jerk!" I managed to mumble.

"Lily, you're the kindest person I know. How can you say that you're a jerk?"

"I hurt Robbie. I...I said something about him that I wasn't supposed to. I made him cry and now everyone hates me."

"_I _don't hate you."

"You weren't there. If only you were, you'd see the kind of monster I am," I told her.

"You'd see that I'm nothing more than a selfish ..."

"Lily, that's enough!" Parker snapped. "I don't want to hear you put yourself down like that anymore. You're amazing. You're smart. You're funny and Beautiful..."

"Why do you think so highly of me, Parker?" I asked. The only people who ever said stuff like that about me were Travis and Ray...but that was because they had crushes on me...

The room fell silent. She backed away from me avoiding eye contact as if her life depended on it.

"Parker?" I asked.

"I love you, Lily," she said as quickly as possible with a sudden rush of courage. I wasn't sure that I heard her right and before I could ask her to repeat herself, I was kissed. Her lips stopped mine protesting...from screaming. And I _wanted_ to scream...didn't I? I was being invaded and I should have screamed. So why didn't I? Maybe because it felt so unreal. Maybe I was dreaming. No, I wasn't dreaming. As the kiss grew deeper, the reality of the situation began to sink in. I was kissing her. I was kissing Parker and loving every second of it!


	5. Can You Fly?

Have you ever had a dream where flying? Suddenly you become weightless and just like that, you're off the ground and nothing can touch you? And you get that crazy feeling in your stomach, like it's spinning around in there? I think that just happened to me, only it wasn't a dream.

After breaking away from my friend, I looked at her and saw her reddened face. She looked as if she was about to cry, and at that point, I forgot about the kiss and thought about what was said before it.

"Parker...did you really mean what you said just now?" I asked her. Once again, she avoided eye contact with me.

"Yes," she mumbled under her breath.

"You can look at me, you know? You can _still_ talk to me."

"I can?" She asked, finally holding her head up and looking at me.

"Yes. I'm you're friend." She smiled at me as she stopped some tears from falling on her shirt. "How long have you felt this way about me?"

"Remember when Audrey and her posse were making fun of that girl sitting at the computer?"

"Yeah, but what did that have to do with anything? You hardly knew me then," I said.

"But remember how _you _didn't make fun of her, and how you called off the friendship after that?"

"Yeah."

"Well, that's what attracted me to you..._and_ the fact that you're hot beyond belief. When I saw you stand up and say something, it showed me that you were a kindhearted person. I love that about you. You're not mad at me?"

"No way. I'm a bit surprised, but mad? No," I assured her. There was a bit of an awkward silence where we just stared at each other for a moment. "So...where do we go from here?"

"I know this might be pushing it, but that Spongebob movie opens tonight. How about we forget about "The Butterfly Effect" and go see _that_...on a date, I mean."

I knew that this was all happening a little fast, but what could be the harm in it? Parker was nice and fun to be around. It would just be like hanging out with her on any other night. It would be fun.

"Cool Beans," I stole her catchphrase before kissing her again and wrapping my arms around her. For once, I actually believed that everything was going to be ok.

**A/N: I know this was short. I promise the next chapter will be longer. It's just that I have other stories to write too. I'm thinking of picking just two stories out of everything and sticking to only them until I finish. **


	6. An Eye For An Eye

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to the-N**

I tried to pay attention to the movie as much as I could, but couldn't help staring at Parker. The way she laughed at David Hasslehoff's chest was adorable. Why didn't I notice this before? I'm attracted to parker and I didn't even know. So _that's_ why I didn't want to stop looking at her when she was dancing at Mickey's. How did I not know this?

She turned to me and smiled before faking a yawn and stretching so that she could put her arm around my shoulders.

"Smooth, Parker. Very smooth," I whispered to her.

"Very smooth indeed," she whispered back to me in her pseudo British accent.

"Shh!" someone said to us.

I giggled, totally ignoring him. "Where did _that_ come from?"

"What, my accent? It come and goes. You should try it sometime, Miss Randall," she said.

"Alright, I think I will, Miss Haines," I said in _my_ fake accent.

"Hey, do you to wanna shut up? We're trying to watch a movie here," the same man yelled.

"Yeah, I didn't pay $8.50 to listen to _you_ two," a woman backed him up.

Parker, keeping up with her accent responded.

"Oy! We paid for the bloody movie too, so sod off, you wankers!" I laughed harder.

"That's it, I'm getting the manager to throw you out," The man said.

"Yeah right. You don't have the guts!"

**-1 minute later-**

We sat down on the sidewalk. "Well, bugger me backwards, he did it!" I held on to my stomach. I felt like I would burst from laughing.

"See, it's _fun_ to talk with different accents."

"I've never seen you act out that way before, Parker. What was up with that?"

"I don't know," she said, finally talking in her normal voice. She scooted closer to me. "All I know is that I haven't seen you so happy in a while, so if making a total ass of myself puts a smile on your face, Randy, I'm glad to do it." She took the strand of stray hair that blocked my face and tucked it behind my ear. "You're beautiful. You know that, right?"

"Sometimes it doesn't hurt to be told," I smiled. Parker gently placed her soft palms on my cheek and brought me in for a kiss. I got totally lost in it, until I heard something.

"That is just sick!" someone shouted from across the street. I pulled away to see a boy shake his head in disgust. "You people have no right to be here!"

I stared at him in shock.

"Lil, come on," Parker said as she tugged at my arm to try and get me to look away from him. "Don't listen to jerks like him. What do _they_ know?"

What _do_ they know?

(Monday morning)

I tried to push it out of my mind, but somehow, I couldn't. "That is just sick!" "You people don't belong here!" Those cruel words rang trough my ears all weekend. Sometimes, I thought that Parker was psychic. She was able to tell that I was thinking about it. That's why she asked me if I was upset about what he said, over and over again. Maybe I was just making it too obvious. I guess I did. Like when I pulled away so that she couldn't hold my hand when she walked me home, or when I said nothing after she told me what a good time she had. Why should I care what other people think? That's what conformists do. I'm not a conformist, I'm Lily Randall!

"Hey," Parker said nervously as she approached me in the hall.

"Hey, I said.

"Can we talk…in private?" She looked around at the busy hallway. Some students were on their way to their next class, while others relaxed on the staircase and against the walls.

"Sure," I said. Let's go outside." It was a bit awkward, the walk. We didn't go very far, but the silence felt like it was going to kill me.

"What's going on…with us? I mean, are we finished? Were we _ever_ even a couple? I need to know. You're hurting me, Lily. You're really hurting me." I could see the tears start to form in her eyes. I felt terrible. I was so busy thinking of myself that I stopped thinking about how Parker felt.

"I'm sorry, Parks. I…I just never thought about the whole discrimination thing. It's never really happened to me, and I got scared. I want you to be my girl, I really do," I said, wiping away her tears.

"You really mean that?"

"Yes, I do. I'll never hurt you again. I promise."

"And I believe you."

"But Parker, You need to know that I'm not ready to come out yet."

"I know you're not. I'm not even sure that _I_ want to. My parents would flip!"

"Tell me about it. I don't know if mine would even _speak_ to me anymore. So this will stay a secret?"

"Yes. Until we're ready, this will be a secret."

"Now that _that's_ out of the way, and we're all alone, can you _please _kiss me? It's been forever," I said.

"I can do that," She said closing the gap between us.

(Behind the trees)

Robbie stood with a satisfied look on his face. "So, Lily's playing for the wrong team now, eh? An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth!"

**A/N: Hope you all like that chapter. Kept my promise and made it longer than the last one. Please review and let me know what you think.**


	7. More Than Infinity

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters.**

"Cream in a can?" I asked Parker politely, shaking it up in front of her.

"Ooh, yes please," she smiled, taking it from me.

"Oh man, I don't think I've ever eaten this much junk food junk food in my whole life!" I said as I rolled off of Parker's bed and onto her floor. She laughed as she joined me.

"Me neither!" she was laying one way and I lay the other, but our heads were side by side as we looked at the moon from the skylight in her ceiling. From the corner of my eyes, I could see the look on her face. Something was definitely on her mind.

"What's the matter, Parks?" I asked her.

"Lily?"

"Yeah?"

"How long do you think we'll last?"

I turned my head to look at her. "What do you mean? I…I can't really tell you that. I have no idea."

"Maybe we _should_ come out." she said.

"Parker, you know that I can't do that."

"And why not? Look, I'm afraid of what my parents will say too, but I…" she faltered.

Her eyes were glistening in the dim light coming from the moon. I changed my position so that I was lying right next to her, face to face. I could feel her stomach, lightly brushing against mine and her quickening breath warming my skin.

She looked at me as she always did…like I was the only other person in the world. I looked at her the same way as I put my palm on her cheek and pulled her in for a kiss. Slow muffled moans escaped her lips, telling me that she was enjoying it. I, too, had to tell her something, and so I broke away.

"Parker, I want you to be happy. That's _all_ I want for you, but you have to understand that I'm not ready for that yet. I want to scream it to the world, how I feel about you, but not right now. Not tonight. Tonight, I just want to focus on us. The rest of the world doesn't exist."

"Lil…" she tried to say something, but there was still something I wanted to tell her.

"Parker, if you love me as much as I love you, you won't say anything about us until we're _both_ ready."

"What was that?" she asked as she sat up in confusion.

"I said, you won't say anything bout us until we're both ready."

"No, before that."

"Oh, I said the rest of the world doesn't exist," I said with a nervous smile.

"You…you said that you loved me, Lily." I could see her start to tear up.

"Yeah," I looked down, and then back at her. "Yeah, I guess I did."

She brought herself closer to me. Her cheeks slightly rubbed against mine before she kissed me.

"I love you," she said.

"I love you too," I told her again.

She looked at me, childishly. "I love you four," Parker said playfully.

"I love you infinity."

And then the look. Parker gave me that look of hers that made me melt. That beautiful half a smile as her eyes focused only on mine.

"I love you more!"

**A/N: If you used to watch "Clueless", you'll know where those last lines came from. I just thought it was something really sweet that needed to be in the story.**


	8. Posters

**A/N: Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about this story. I've just been tiring to finish off my fic for TSR, and now that I'm done, I can focus more on this.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to the-N**

Parker and I agreed to have our relationship stay a secret for a bit longer. I wasn't ready, and she seemed very understanding about it.

We arrived at school early, the following Monday. I started to blush when I saw everyone looking at me and Parker. At first, I thought that maybe I looked really good, but soon, I was thinking other things.

"I can't believe I slept on the same _bed_ as you," Audrey said. She pushed herself off of the locker that she had been leaning against so that she could block my path.

"What are you talking about?" I asked nervously.

"Oh, don't act so innocent! We all know," she said as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"You know? Know what?" A devilish grin appeared on her face as she moved to the side and pointed to a poster on the door to the girl's washroom. In the poster was a picture of Parker and I. Above it, it said, "Homo's _get_ AIDS. Homo's _give_ AIDS. Stay away from them!"

"Who did this?" I asked angrily as I ripped it off the wall. "Who did this?!?" I looked around at the crowd of kids in the hall. One face in particular stood out. Sure enough, right in the middle of all off them, was Robbie McGrath, smiling triumphantly. He winked at me and walked away.

I left Parker to follow him, wanting to rip the smile right off his face. I saw him turn the corner. As I was about to turn it too, I saw another poster of me and Parker. I grunted in frustration as I took it down and began to run after him. He was leaning against a wall with on foot up against it. He pretended to polish his fingernails on his shirt.

"You…" I started.

"Lily Randall, it's a pleasure to see you," He said.

I broke into tears as I grabbed his shirt. I pulled him off of the wall a little bit, just so that I could shove him back onto it.

"Why did you do it, Robbie? Why did you do it?"

"Why did _you_ do it? I trusted you to keep a secret and you told Travis and Ray.

"I was frustrated Robbie. Not only did I loose Travis, but I lost Ray as well. I went from being somebody that people loved, to just a nobody," I said with my voice shaking. I pointed my finger at him. "Now, I told them your secret, Robbie, and for that, I am _so_ sorry. But think about it. What did you get out of it? No more sneaking around. You can hold Kim in public. You can go _anywhere_ with her."

"That's true. I…I never thought about it like that," He said, looking sorry.

"Yeah well, you should have. See, with _me_, it's a totally different story. People are disgusted with us! They think that they can catch something from us, which couldn't _be_ further from the truth, since we haven't _done_ anything. I don't know how you found out, but what you did was wrong. It was worse that what _I_ did to _you_! Far worse." Robbie seemed to be taking what I was saying very seriously.

"Lily, I'm sorry!"

"That doesn't change what you did. I _still_ don't know what I'm going to do."

"I know. I feel really bad about this. This must be _terrible_ for Parker. _She_ had absolutely nothing to do with _any_ of this. You…you must care about her a lot.

"Of course I do. I love her. I…I…" Suddenly, I heard footsteps. I thought it was someone else coming to give me a hard time, and I was quick to get scared. "I…don't care about her, Robbie," I lied. "What are you talking about?"

"Lily?"

"I have no idea why you thought that I was dating _Parker_. Eww!" I made over exaggerated gagging motions.

"What? But I thought that you said…"

"That I don't like her. It's all just a silly rumor, me and Parker. I'm not like that. I like boys. In fact…" I was trying to think of someone of the opposite sex that wasn't taken. "I…I like…Ed!"

"Ed?"

"Ed! Trust me, Parker means nothing to me. Never has, never will!" I said. Surely, the person I heard coming heard my words and thought that what I was saying was true. That's what I was hoping with all of my heart.

I no longer heard footsteps. I heard quiet sniffling. Robbie and I looked at each other before going over to see who it was. I felt like my heart was about to burst when I saw Parker with tears in her eyes. She was leaning against a wall, but soon slid down until she was sitting on the cold floor as she cried into her knees.

"Lily…" she said softly, in between sobs.

"I didn't know it was you. I…I didn't!" I fell to my knees, ready to beg for forgiveness before she spoke again.

"Just go," she cried.

"Park…"

"JUST GO!"

**A/N: I'm sorry it took me so long to update. It's almost over, though. I think It could be about 2 more chapters.**


	9. You Sweared You Loved Me More

**Dis claimer: I don't on these characters. They belong to the-N**

**-I don't own "There Is" it belongs to Boxcar Racer.**

And so I messed up again. What was my problem? Why did I always have to loose people like that? Why did I have to loose _Parker _like that? It was me and my big mouth, I know. I shouldn't have said what I said…

"Lily?" My mother came into my room. She stood at the door with a worried look. "Lily, what's wrong? You know you can tell me anything, right? I know something happened," she said softly. She came and took a seat on my bed. At that point, I got up and walked to my radio by the window. Loud music filled my ears, almost fulfilling its duty, which was to drown my mother's voice out. She looked at me and realized that I wasn't in the mood for talking to her. "Alright, then," she said as she stood up. "We're having dinner downstairs if you feel like joining us." And with that, she was gone.

I put my back against the bed frame as sat on my floor and closed my eyes. A new song started to play. I listened to it, thinking about how much it reminded me of Parker. What _didn't_?

_(I faintly remember breathing_

_On your bedroom floor_

_Where I laid and told you _

_But you sweared you loved me more) _

With those words, I remembered when I first told her that I loved her. I remembered how much fun we had, eating junk food and watching the stars through her skylight. I couldn't have cared _less_ about anyone else in the word, as long as parker was there with me.

"I'm an idiot!" I said. "I don't deserve her!" Needing to wipe my eyes, I got up to go to my dresser. There, right next to the tissue box, was a picture of Parker and I. It was taken that same night in her room. That night where I looked at her and knew _exactly_ how I felt about her. No, I _didn't_ deserve her, but if she'd take me back, I'd do what ever it took to come close. I knew she wouldn't, though. I was too ashamed to come out to those stupid kids I called my "friends" and now I'd have to suffer. It was too late to take back what I said. I just hoped that the boys were having better times with _their_ girlfriends that I was...

Something hit me. The boys! I had just thought of something, and if it worked, then maybe…just maybe, I would get parker back. I had to call them…

**A/N: Ok that chapter sucked! To be totally honest, I had something _really_ good in my head, but because I took so long to update, I forgot what the hell it was, so now, I have to make up a new ending. I was going to do it all today, but I'd rather give it _time_ than give you guys more garbage from my mind. **


	10. The End

**A/N: I just want to clear something up because it's a bit confusing. This whole chapter is supposed to be in 1st person. There is a part where shady Lane is talking and It sounds like it's in 3rd person, but it's like that for a reason that I cannot explain at the moment without ruining it. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters.**

"Hey, Parker," I said when I saw her at her locker the next day. She didn't look at me, not that there was any reason that she _should_ have. She took out the English books she would need for her next class.

"Shouldn't you be with _Ed_ right now, you know, since you like him so much?"

"Parker, that was a mistake. I thought that you were somebody else. I panicked and said a bunch of stuff that I didn't mean so that…" I stopped myself from saying 'I wouldn't get embarrassed any further.' Parker, however, knew what I meant to say and took it upon herself to say it out loud.

"Am I really so horrible, Lily, that you want hide me from the rest of the world?" She finally looked into my eyes, but it wasn't as great as I dreamt it would be. They were tired and hurt. They were puffy and red. Most of all, they didn't have the glow that they always seemed to have. Parker was devastated and it was all thanks to me and my big mouth. Me and my fear of being out.

"I love you, Parker," I told her from the bottom of my heart.

"I _know_ you do, Lily. I guess just not enough," she said as she closed her locker and went to class, leaving me there alone, my mind soaking in all of her words.

-

I met up with Robbie, Travis and Ray at after dinner for our last important discussion on the events of tomorrow morning. For the past two days, we had been talking about the plan that I had come up with when I was in my bedroom. I wanted Parker back, so badly, I would have done anything. It hit me, the perfect way I could get her back. I was lucky. I had something that only 4 other Roscoe students had access to, and I was going to use it…

-

(The next day)

"Yo and hello. This is Kim Carlisle and It's time to smile a while…" Kim's voice poured into the halls of the school.

While most students cringed at the thought of having to go through another morning announcement from the girl, Parker stood at her looker again, going through the motions. Everyday had become a repeat of the last, she noticed as she took out her books to get ready for class.

"Don't forget that next week, Cougar Radio will be hosting our 2nd annual…" Kim's voice was interrupted by static, flowed by a familiar voice.

"This is Radio Free Roscoe; you're one-watt flamethrower of truth!" A few students began to clap, while others began to tune in, suddenly interested in what they were hearing.

"I'm Question Mark and I'm wondering: why are we so cruel? Why can we do things like make fun of others, or start rumors about the people we claim to be friends with? A lot of you may have noticed a certain poster on the walls of the school. It was a terrible thing to do and the person who did it was being a jerk. You can't catch anything by being friends with someone that has a different sexual preference, other than a bad case of ignorance, but I'm pretty sure that if you believed you _could_, you'd have to already be as ignorant as they come. Any thoughts on this, Shady?"

"Actually yeah. I have something to say. It's about a friend of mine that was involved in all of this," There was a slight pause. Her voice sounded shaky, but she went on with it. Parker looked at the speaker closest to her, feeling an unbelievably strong connection to the talking DJ. "Love has no gender. You can't help who you fall in love with, and that's what a friend of mine told me. Her name is Lily Randall. She fell in love with a girl. Parker…"

Everyone in the hall looked at her, but she didn't care. She was too focused on what Shady Lane was saying.

"I was talking to Lily the other day, actually. And she was telling me about how amazing Parker is. She told me how much she loves her laugh, and her adorable British accent. She told me about how beautiful she looks when she's in her room and the moonlight shines down on her…" Shady's voice began to break a little. That's when parker started to get the feeling that she and Lily were one and the same. "One other thing that Lily told me was how one day, when she was feeling depressed and her best friend came up to her and cheered her up. How she said that one day, she'd meet someone who was going to blow her way. We'll guess what, Parker…"

"You blew me away," I said as I wrapped my arms around the girl from behind.

"Lily?" Parker asked me. "But I though you were…"

"What, you thought that _I_ was Shady Lane for A second? As If I own the easily purchased tape recorder needed to do such a thing." I smiled as I spun her around in kind of a dancing fashion. Plenty of students were watching us. Some of them were quite disgusted, but the more I looked at them, the less I cared about them. I focused only on the wonderful girl in my arms. I kissed her on the lips with more passion and wanting than ever.

"What about…" I interrupted her with one more kiss.

"Like a friend of mine once said, 'if you've got a girl, it's a real shame to keep her a secret'."

THE END

**A/N: Ok, I know that that was pretty corny, but, it's an ending, at least. (Actually, If you read this chapter a few hours before, you'd notice that it was different. I dropped some stuff out of this becuuse it sounded really bad. I know people might be a bit bad that I left the story this way, but trust me,it's better that it was before without all that extra junk)I hope it was to your liking. Thanks for the reviews, everyone. **


End file.
